HEY THERE
I’m Allie and I’m so glad you found me!
When I was 23 and had my first genital herpes outbreak I was living a very different life than I am now. I used to say I was a different person, but more recently I’ve learned that that’s not true. I am the same person, with the same spirit, it’s just so much stronger, so much more open and loving, much more vulnerable, in the best way, and much healthier too. My herpes experience happened for me, not to me.
I was in my early 20’s, living in New York City, running on the adrenaline of a busy job, lots of partying, tons of caffeine, and lots of new experiences (good and bad!).
There was never a dull moment, never a moment to deeply reflect on what I wanted, and more importantly, never a moment to heal. I had moved up to New York from Athens, Georgia, after college, and was hopeful to catapult my career right away (I didn’t know what patience meant at the time). For better or worse I threw myself into the fast paced lifestyle, and while there were tons of learnings and fun times that came with it, eventually it caught up with me. Getting genital herpes was much more profound for me than just suddenly having a stigmatized skin rash, it was a wake up call to slow down and come back into alignment with who I really was. The initial fear, physical pain, confusion and nervous system shock was not fun, it was HARD. But it was a gift, in the most radical way. I’ve always had a knowing that I was here to help others relieve suffering, and now I know that this is the way that God has allowed me to do so.
I got my first genital herpes outbreak a few months
after I lost my virginity.
It was shocking and extremely frustrating as I was so careful for so long, and was trying to wait to have sex until I was in a serious, potentially life long relationship. Via blood tests, I learned that I had Herpes 1, which was technically the oral version, but I got it down under. This is very common, but unfortunately still very difficult, and dating proved to be challenging. I thought at the time that I was never going to be able to date someone who didn’t also have herpes - why would they want to risk getting it? I learned later this was NOT the way to think. Dating would just look a bit different, and that was also an amazing lesson and longer story for another time. Anyway, when I first got it, I was absolutely devastated, depressed and the more I learned over that first year, the more confused I became. Half of the doctors I went to said I should tell potential sexual partners, and half said there was no need, and that I might never get an outbreak again.
To share or not to share?
I learned in therapy that crippling uncertainty leads to depression and boy did I experience this. To share or not to share? I also had no idea how to manage my outbreaks and it seemed like I was going to live with it forever. I made a promise to myself and to God, in the middle of a typical sleepless night a few months after my first outbreak, that I would crush this stigma and provide relief and hope to others who were faced with this challenge.
My first step, though, was to figure out how to take care of myself and move forward, past my herpes diagnosis.
First, I decided to change career paths and pursue a job and lifestyle that was more “me” than ever before. I enrolled in Yoga Teacher Training, started waitressing at a Manhattan restaurant to support myself, and I started shifting my priorities away from day drinking in Brooklyn and nights out in West Village, to taking hiking trips, teaching yoga at local studios, and networking with others who were pursuing their passions.
It took time, but I learned how to completely manage my herpes outbreaks, and would go years at a time without having one.
I also learned how to be open, honest, and understanding when dating and sharing with men. I knew the more I shared, the more varying responses I would experience, and this has given me a confidence and resilience that has carried me through. It has led me into beautiful romantic relationships.
Once I was living in alignment things started to happen for me (after feeling like a victim for too long!). I met the CEO of a corporate wellness company and joined her to lead her sales, as her first employee. Did I ever think I would find a company that brought so many things I loved to people all over the world (yoga, meditation, nutrition programs, mental health programs, etc)? Nope! But I did, and we took off! I continued to teach yoga in my free time, lead surf retreats, and travel much more than I imagined possible. Eventually I left New York, and am now living in Southern California to be near the ocean for my current biggest passion - surfing.
YOU’RE NOT ALONE
Everyone’s experience and journey with herpes is different
But you don’t have to go through it alone, and you don’t need to go for years living in mental turmoil or in physical pain.
I have accepted that it took me quite some time to overcome genital herpes, but because of the time I spent learning and navigating my situation, instead of covering it up and pretending it wasn’t there, I am now in a position to help guide others through their experience, to help them put their herpes diagnosis behind them (QUICKLY!), and to move forward with confidence, joy, and a deep sense of peace and acceptance.
Everyone deserves to experience peace, and if you are one of the millions suffering because of a herpes diagnosis, don’t give up. Take your life back, and learn how to turn your situation around and thrive. I’m here to help you do this.
GET IN TOUCH
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I can’t wait to connect. : )